149, 2 more pounds.. 1200 colories works good :)

i want to lose weight, not starve myself. it maybe a choice to some but its really not, it has to stem from where, weather they believe that or not. once you get it theres no end, until theres an end to you.

i know what i want, to be thin. what i dont want is food, its gross.. and i've always aten too much of it. starting to feel really guilty ! but i refuse to starve myself.  i do not want my family or friends to see me look sickly, just because it looks to me or its what i want or i believe, its something where i've got to think of my nephews, cats dogs... everyone everything. Mom would be very disapointed if i died because i was fat and wanted oh so bad to be a skeleton hiding in everyones dirty closet.