wow!

i just did my math.

high weight: 176
Current weight: 114
pounds lost: 62

God i ate waaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too much food! 2 peices of corn on the cob (with butter ewe.) like 6 ozes of meat .. i didnt have noodles today. well from todays stress im just tired and nauseated. my ex wont leave me alone. it keeps setting me back like i've changed my mind. i know he loves me but i cant go back to that. i absolutley refuse to live like that.
this is my religious thing down below if u dont believe ill advise you.. this is a bit crazy.

MY letter To God

Dear God,
      I'm ready to accept my punishment. i know in my heart hes lost without me on this earth. but hes so angry. he thinks as though he is the person he is in heaven. I know we're soul mates.. that we have a mission together but how can we work together if he dont know how to change? he only knows how to get his way. Im not putting it all on him God, i take some of the blame too. I lied, Cheated..i should have left before that. Give me your Salvation God and Bless the Holy Man. Bless the Arch Angel Michael and give him my heart. He's always had it. He was never Made for this world. was that our test, god? and this our punishment? You pushed me too far God, you've really done it. Maybe i am being selfish. In a matter of fact, I admit to it. I've taken care of everyone else, havent I god? havent i done enough dos to go get my own done? Havent I god, always gave my heart and soul to everyone else? Helped poeple through, give them anything they want? Maybe because i have not worked hard for what i have done. Maybe God, but i dont know. i do know is that im a nice person. I took care of him God, mike and everyone else. it took me twice to leave God TWICE. now he wants a chance? How many Chances can i give him before I run out of my health? Before i run down myself. this Does sound selfish. its all about me. but a take a look around, Really, see. it was always about him, the way HE treated me. and honestly, it still is.